“Drinkability,” as a rating of a beer, has to be among the most egregious bullshit terms ever devised by man. Drinkability. Drinkability. In a peer-reviewed paper (a peer-reviewed paper), drinkability is defined as “A beer that … invites the drinker to another glass.” Stop. Right. There. STOP. Stop, stop, stop. Right. There.
Drinkability is the category a brewer uses to hype his brew when every other category one can use has failed him:
“The customers think our beer tastes like gravel. They say it tastes like watered-down gravel.”
“That’s one of the categories?”
“No, that’s just the write-in votes.”
“Have you asked about wetness? Or fizziness? Or foofarallitude? How does our beer do on foofarallitude?”
“It’s not looking good, sir.”
“Hmm. Have you asked them about its drinkability?”
“Not yet. What’s that?”
“I don’t give a good goddamn what it is, just ask them about it. They’re going to get tired sooner or later.”
“Okay. How do you want me to spell that?”
I hate people.