Time’s Person of the Year: Me

Person of the Year

First of all, I’d like to thank all the little people I’ve stepped on and over on my way to the top. I couldn’t have done it without you and the friction that your various body parts supplied to the bottom of my sneakers. Second, let me say that it’s a real honor and a privilege to be named Time’s “Person of the Year,” especially in light of all the competition: Middle East warlords, Korean warlords, American cowboys, William Gray, and the rest.* I’m touched that Time would see fit to acknowledge my contributions in the areas of internet surfing, beer drinking, and potato chip consumption. I didn’t think anyone really noticed, except for my wife and the check-out people down at the supermarket. Thanks guys! I love you all!

* the professor & Mary Ann.
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