We’ve agreed to bury it here

We establish the importance of an event or idea by mashing and smashing it, kicking it around, to see where it ends up in the community’s Big Ball of History and Importance. “9/11 goes here; pet rocks go here.”

After the thing has found its spot on the ball, if it’s deemed important, it takes a lot of effort to move it. That’s why no one wanted to hear what Galileo had to say. It would involve a lot of digging and heavy lifting, and everybody was already sitting down comfortably in easy chairs.

If it’s deemed unimportant, it comes to occupy a little hidey-hole in some out of the way place, and is very easy to move about. If one can track down all the mentions of an event, one can fabricate plausible lies and change history: “The pet rock was first mentioned in conversation in Little Rock, Arkansas.” “Really? Whoa.”

Britney Spears will end up in a little hidey-hole in an out of the way place, eventually. People will tell the most obtuse lies about her, and other people will believe them. But since we had the tremendous foresight to hammer her onto an inconsequential region of the Ball, none of it will matter.

Here’s an example of what we will deem important: the coming presidential elections. The coming presidential elections will matter. These elections are weighty, and what comes out of these elections will be even weightier. Sides will be taken. No dumb lies will be told; all lies will be cagy and mean.

These elections are going to be put in the Ball’s juicy center. It will be decades before a historian offers a different view of what happened than that which the winners will dictate: “We’ve agreed to bury it here; we’re going to bury it right here.”

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