Category Archives: original research

When your muse is banging on all cylinders

Posted on February 20, 2019 by ecto
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1997

Posted on January 23, 2019 by ecto

There was this group of American kids on the steps outside the Venice train station; each had a bottle of wine she was drinking, each was sitting next to her backpack. It was 9 in the evening or so, we … Continue reading →

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team

Posted on September 20, 2018 by ecto

With apologies to Sidney Harris, whose artwork I appropriated.

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They’re ALL going to die

Posted on May 22, 2018 by ecto

I just noticed that they’re all going to die. They’re all going to die. I need to stop saying “Oh, that’s too bad” when celebrities keel over, because they’re all going to do that at some point, until I do. … Continue reading →

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Violent E pauses to philosophize in Jarkhand

Posted on February 15, 2018 by ecto

That took longer than I thought it would

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More Legroom

Posted on August 22, 2017 by ecto

If I pay you an extra fifty dollars, I don’t want you to pinch me less hard, I want you to stop fucking pinching me. That’s why “more legroom” coach is such a hard sell. Yes, it’s better than regular … Continue reading →

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Crank

Posted on June 30, 2017 by ecto

The difference between the fiftieth time and the five hundredth. Wouldn’t it be great if every time were the fiftieth time?

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Puerto Rico

Posted on June 17, 2017 by ecto

If we admit them, we’ll have to admit a slave state too. It’s more complicated than it looks.

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Posted on March 19, 2017 by ecto

$151,000, just sitting there in a market-tracking account, makes as much money every year as a full-time minimum-wage worker.

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exciting times

Posted on September 5, 2016 by ecto

If Hillary Clinton is elected, it will mark only the second time that a married couple has been elected individually to the Presidency, following Grover Cleveland and husband Benjamin Cleveland Harrison. Truly a remarkable accomplishment.

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Posted on April 6, 2016 by ecto
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Posted on February 18, 2015 by ecto
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Posted on October 10, 2014 by ecto
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Posted on September 28, 2014 by ecto
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Question: is there a cartoon that is anywhere near consistently funnier than Futurama?

Posted on June 13, 2012 by ecto

Answer: No, there is no such cartoon.

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the ethnography of the liquor people

Posted on August 7, 2010 by ecto

When I was a kid I wondered whether I’d turn in to one of the guys I read about, guys who ordered hot toddies in cherry-paneled rooms. Guys who smoked meerschaum pipes or large cigars while waiting for the butler … Continue reading →

Posted in curmudgeonhood, humor, original research | 1 Comment

hybrid fuel economy tall-tale

Posted on January 11, 2010 by ecto

You know how it’s said that a hybrid gets better city mileage than highway mileage because 1) the gas engine shuts off when the car is stopped, and 2) because of regenerative braking? That’s gotta be bullshit, and here’s why:  … Continue reading →

Posted in curmudgeonhood, humor, original research, science | 3 Comments

those lying, lying liars

Posted on April 24, 2009 by ecto

You know how scientists and historians are liable to liken the total time civilization has existed versus the total time the earth has existed to “the blink of an eye?” At the drop of a hat? I’ve always taken their … Continue reading →

Posted in big idea, curmudgeonhood, humor, original research, science | 5 Comments

Bill Gray

Posted on May 31, 2006 by ecto

The Tempest (Joel Achenbach, Washington Post, May 28) Gray’s crusade against global warming “hysteria” began in the early 1990s, when he saw enormous sums of federal research money going toward computer modeling rather than his kind of science, the old-fashioned … Continue reading →

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Question: Why take diet pills when you can enjoy Aids?

Posted on February 19, 2006 by ecto

PistolWimp – AYDS: America I remember this commercial. I don’t remember it being so funny. And I guess the weird and irritating use of the word “question” to preface a question has been around longer than I thought. I tried … Continue reading →

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