Cast off this taint, and become taintless

I think my best bet is to chuck it all and become a wise elder in a jungle tribe in Sumatra. I could totally do it. I’m probably older than 90% of wise Sumatran elders, and I’ve noticed several things about the stars and the weather. Probably more than enough to put other elders to shame. I’d have to bone up on which berries are poisonous and which tentacled things positively melt in your mouth, but that’s where the internet comes in.

I’d totally own that tribe, as long as I could learn the language prior to being beaten senseless and eaten by those I aim to replace. Ideally, they’d never see it coming. One day a friendly white stranger comes into camp with bags of potato chips and cotton candy, the next day the entire tribal intelligentsia are out on their asses looking for work as tentacle dowsers in the next valley over.

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